Abuse is still being seen as either physical or sexual. In the case of sexual abuse it is only being seen as sexual abuse by most people once full on penetration took part. This misconception you still get on a daily basis among people. Then there is the further misconception that only male’s is the abusers and only women is the victims. Due to this many time people are abused over and over by members of the public, the media, the judicial system and even their friends and family. By talking about it we all can help to break down these barriers and get people to better understand abuse.
In the case of sexual (penetration) and physical abuse it leaves marks and is easily detected with a medical examination. We can also see the marks and therefore it is much easier to sympathise with the victim. It is the types of abuse where there is no marks that people do not want to acknowledge that it exist and or happens to them. This is the abuse we need to talk about. This is the abuse that women so easily use and the male victims feel they cannot go to the South African Police with. This is the abuse that leaves the lifelong emotional marks which no one can see but do experience the daily effects of.
For the purposes of this article I will mostly talk of females as the victims and males as the abusers but please note out of experience we at Ukukhanya have found that just as many men is the victims as women and just as many women is the abusers as males.